“Actual happiness always looks pretty squalid in comparison with the over compensations for misery. And, of course, stability isn’t nearly so spectacular as instability. And being contented has none of the glamour of a good fight against misfortune, none of the picturesqueness of a struggle with temptation, or a fatal overthrow by passion or doubt. […]
"/>

Why Bother?

Home / Late night thoughts / Why Bother?

“Actual happiness always looks pretty squalid in comparison with the over compensations for misery. And, of course, stability isn’t nearly so spectacular as instability. And being contented has none of the glamour of a good fight against misfortune, none of the picturesqueness of a struggle with temptation, or a fatal overthrow by passion or doubt. Happiness is never grand.”
― Aldous Huxley, Brave New World

It’s highly overrated the concept of happiness, I’ve always thought it was. And while my mind goes on overdrive, thinking and breaking down each moment, and every word, calculating and making feasibility charts of my life, trying to save myself the sorrow and pain, I swiped all source of happiness along the way; those figments of pure bliss, making my to-do lists, setting up my life goals, dreaming, sitting beside you on the bench, twinkle in my eyes, a twitching smile on my lips… The feeling of floating above the clouds, dancing and whirling around the falling Autumn leaves, were replaced by increasing chest pains, hyperventilation, and numbness in my right arms. It was nerve wrecking and completely in my own hands.

The reason of doing what I did, taking the decision of staying away from what I thought would soon break my heart, was beyond me. Irrationality, at its best, was taking over. Until I decided to take a step back from the chaotic thoughts, rearrange my head, and instead of complicated algebra and analysis, go back to simple arithmetic, of follow what makes you happy, and drop what causes you severe depression. Why follow what’s supposed to be stable, when you can go drunk in the insanity of love? If I were to fall, then let me fall hard, drop to the lowest grounds, give in to temptation, let it destroy every ounce of myself, let it wash the last speck of reason from within, and let it disperse my harmony, just as the wind does my hair, remove the knot and let my curls flow to the rhythm of the breeze. If I’m to crumble, I’m going to marvel in the magic of destruction, in its raw beauty, in all its splendor.

Ecstasy and agony walk hand by hand, if you want happiness you’re undoubtedly bound to get agony for free. It’s how much you value the good, that raises its price, why bother think it through? it’s as vital as water, that rush of blood to your head. It’s a need, consume it.

Related Posts
Follow

Follow this blog

Get every new post delivered right to your inbox.

Email address

%d bloggers like this: